Thumbs up for change

Last week was emotionally hectic.

Our lastborn started school - as you can see she was raring to go.

She believes she is one of the teachers rather than a member of 'Bluebells'. From the second day onwards she didn't even want me to go in with her but rather, dump her on the kerb nearby. (I refused of course, I like looking at her for as long as possible.)

On the same day I went back to school too. I have started an Art Foundation course. I am in way over my head. I have bought a Wonder Woman pencil case though - so I can intimidate all my arty student mates.

The next day Child A went on his first ever residential trip with school.

He took it like a man. They stayed up most of the night telling farty jokes and giggling in to their pillows.

On the same day, our youngest boy decided to have a birthday - how helpful. He turned 8. He got a Lamborghini which will have to last him until he buys his real one later. His life plan is this: Play drums with a christian band telling the whole world about Jesus. Play football for Chelsea, England and Worthing United in his spare time. Buy a Lamborghini with all the money he earns.

"Summer days, d-riftin' away.."

During my brief spell as a teacher I used to feel really sad when parents rolled their eyes and heaved great sighs of doom about the holidays. Well, now I have much more sympathy, especially if you need to sort childcare out – what a nightmare. It can be tricky if it rains, and it's hard if your children are a wide range of ages, but mine all tend to bumble along together for now, and the sun's out : so far so good.

Evie has made a 'cage' for a caterpillar by folding up a sheet of kitchen towel and securing it with a clothes peg and a hair clip. The boys have been setting fire to things, thanks to their dad teaching them how to burn stuff using a magnifying glass (thanks for that Col). They've coloured bricks in with chalk and they've written a rock song or two. We've been out and about a bit, but my favourite days are the least spectacular ones, when not much is going on but everyone's OK with it.

Years ago I was told you have to have a battle plan. (Linda McCanna) Here's mine:

1. I will not feel not feel intimidated by the amazing ‘National trust/bug hunt/football club/Legoland/family fun day/£100 down the drain’- type advertising

2. I will not give in to jealousy fueled by facebook statuses - everyone else isn't having way more fun than me with their incessant BBQ’s and trendy mates.

3. I will not feel pressured to get dressed unless it is absolutely necessary

My role model is Stacey, I think she's got the right idea:

M

3 I'

Growing pains

I paid my last cheque to The Sunshine Nursery today as Evie has left – boo hoo. What fun she’s had there. I remember chatting to Gill the manager when I was deciding to send Evie there, and she asked me if I minded if Evie got paint on her or got messy. I replied ‘That’s what being two is for isn’t it?’ and I knew then that we were on the same wavelength. I think that this sums Sunshine up – it’s all about children being children, not about looking swish and ticking boxes or whatever. Put simply, it looks like so much fun when you pick up your little one. Things you want to play with yourself – little plastic pigs and cows on a muddy puddle surrounded by squares of turf (how much fun is that?) - homemade painted paper bunting all around the garden; the long eared rabbit looking through the patio door from the lounge; special scones brought home in a special paper basket decorated with special flowers; play doh pizzas set out on plates; sunflowers and beans being watched and measured by intensive little farmers. It makes you a bit jealous really.

I can’t avoid mentioning the singing!! It’s like living in a musical. I haven’t been there for it but I’ve heard the overflow – ‘Five currant buns from the bacon shop’ …. ‘mix the compost, wiggle it around, soil needs feedin’ just like YOU’ …. ‘ we’re gonna catch a big one, we’re not scared’…. ‘Hello E-vie, hello Lu-cy, hello Nem-ma, hello Felica…liza-beth’ ….. on and on it goes, when we’re out in the car or she’s day dreaming on the loo or pottering round the garden. It makes me sad to think at some point she’ll realise it’s not cool to sing to yourself when you’re out and about, but for now – thank you Sunshine because you’re such a happy place! The staff still manage to be enthusiastic at the nativity every single year, and still shed a tear when the big ones leave – well to me, that says a lot: it’s more than just a job for them.

So let’s start up one for adults! Or at least let’s start a revolution and sing loudly to ourselves in public. It will at least help me get over this painful little fact though, that my weeny girl is ready for shiny shoes and big school. (sigh…)

Pigeon shock

There’s always something you miss when you’re packing – and in our case it was a large pigeon and a cake tin behind the plinth of a kitchen cupboard. Eeeeeww!! Not a dead pet, but a visitor who fell down the chimney. Apologies to anyone who has eaten at our house lately, especially if you were served cake.

Other than that, no big surprises. Thanks to all who expressed concern about my branch. Yes, it got moved safely, along with all the other random bits of nic-nackery. It was really exciting when the lorry arrived - it was just so, well, BIG and SHINY!! Genuinely exciting! The kids got a small ride in it after I convinced the men I wouldn’t sue the company if anything happened.

In fact the removal men were lovely – they checked if anyone needed a cuddly toy before packing the beds (you know how Colin can kick off) and even had time to play with a tiny frog who had hidden illegally in the back of the lorry, in one of the plants. The frog got through customs because he was so cute, and we named him Brooklyn and made him a home. ‘How did the removal men have time for all this?’ I hear you cry. Well it turns out they didn’t, because they didn’t finish until10pm. But at least they were friendly eh?

Moving and Changing

Today we're packing as we’re moving house. Seven years ago we moved over the road. Five years before that, we moved round the corner, so moving a few miles west is very adventurous. Whatever happens it’s been a good experience because it’s forced me to tidy up and clear out. It has also hilighted a number of differences between my husband and myself (like we needed a few more?) but I’ll leave that for another day.

If you are bored this summer I suggest you imagine you’re moving and 'purge the house of extraneous matter' as Bridget Jones said. Chances are, you have more stuff than you think you do. I had a cupboard full of cleaning products for goodness sake, and I’m hardly Anthea Turner.

So we’re not carrying any excess baggage now, and that’s a good feeling. All over West Sussex people are waking up gleefully looking at the stuff they bought from us at the car boot sale a few weeks back. “How did I cope without this shoe rack?”, exclaims tattooed man from Shoreham. “This karaoke machine has brought my whole family back together!” says crazy Glaswegian singing man. “Why did I quibble over this beach hut coat rack, it was worth £1 after all” says Mr. Best-phone-the-wife-to-check. Ahhh, warm feelings. We are glad to have been of assistance.

So, if you come over this summer and see something horrendous, keep your opinions to yourself please – the thing that you’re looking at has been purposefully kept, tidied, packed, moved and unpacked. I hope the removal men are friendly because some of these 'saved things' look like nothing but I am keeping them. An old branch springs to mind. A big stone. A dried seed head. Who can predict what people find precious? If the removal men giggle at my branch I will wish I'd gone with the another company. I certainly won't be sharing the left-over World Cup final cake with them anyway. We shall see...

crowd control

This is Evie giving out those stickers at Bokletsa Bana - the place where the children come from the townships for the afternoon and kick their heels up, run around and play games to their hearts' content. This pic is before she started shouting "Calm DOWN" at them - they were getting a bit over the top. 

family news

Col bagged himself a couple of new wives - they're really cool and they've been a massive help during my Widow Twankey Washerwoman week. 

So we're home. King Shaka International Airport was SHINY - shiny toilets, shiny luggage trolleys, shiny, glittery flooring - cool! We had a long, long day and a longer night but we got back to the UK at 5 am yesterday. I think drizzle and chilliness upon arrival home aids the grieving process - boo hooo. 

When we got back home there was a big welcome banner, a cake and even a meal ready in the fridge among other things - how lucky are we, thanks everyone and we can't wait to see you and we'll try not to bore your heads off.

The boys have just gone to school. They looked sort of wrong in uniform. I have been dreading coaxing them back into socks and shoes, they've loved running free and we all feel a bit glum about that. At the military museum last week they ran around the steam engine on an old war ship, clambering up nearly vertical iron steps and swinging on chains, walking across metal grill platforms, and there was not one notice up saying "Keep off this" or "Step away from that". don't get me wrong, it was not easy viewing as a mother - one child piggy backing another across an iron ledge above your head - but it was nice to have the choice! (By the way lots of the parts were supplied by Howdens in Wallsend so I sent my buddies in Tyne and Wear extra love that day.) 

Another thing that's really noticeable in SA is how the kids just run in and out of the traffic. They do it from the beginning and there's no pavements so I guess they just know what they're doing. One day on a long journey inland we saw 2 really tiny school boys walking to lessons and we stopped to take a photo and wave - then they RAN ACROSS the main road in their bare feet to chat through our car window! We were completely freaking out, I thought they were going to get mown down in front of us!! We had a funny chat with them though and gave them some biscuits. Imagine in England - we'd be thinking 'health and safety/stranger danger/peodophiles/allergies' all in one breath. Kids there, they just grow up quicker. In Lesotho our host told us little girls (always the women!) start carrying the water as soon as they can walk, and in the end they can carry 25 litres each. So how come English kids can't carry their own book bag back to the car after school?!

Well enough of this - I've got washing to do. Evie is very lonely today so I think I'll fulfill her dearest wish expressed on safari, "I hate being on holiday, I just wanna go home and watch Elmo's Christmas Countdown". Ha!! 

It's not over till it's over

It’s our last day and there’s a lot to do. So why did we stay up till silly o’ clock drinking wine and hanging out with our New Best Friends John and Susan who have lent us their flat? There’s a bit of me that wonders if we’ll ever get home. We heard Peyman and family didn’t fly out after all this week, but have been put back to the 10^th. I’m sure that won’t happen to us. But there are still a few hoops of fire to jump through and camouflage nets to crawl under – Durban opened its’ brand new airport today and we heard that even the staff don’t know where things are! So we’ll be one of their first passengers…. if we can find the airport in the first place of course. We haven’t got lost for two days straight now but it’s not easy. Did I mention Durban is in the process of changing all its’ road names? The old names are being changed to Zulu names, which are not on the map of course. Also there’s lots of road works and diversions because they’re sprucing up ready for the world cup. Anyway the plan is that we fly to Johannesburg tomorrow at 10.30, then we wait around at that airport until our elusive night flight at 8pm. That’s an awful lot of rounds of Snap.

We had a special meal today and I gave out certificates of bravery… eg. Evie conquered her fear of jellyfish stings, and took it on the chin when she toppled over and grabbed on to a tree trunk for support, but it turned out to be a huge cactus/ tree with spines sticking out of the trunk – ouch. Finlay has become a brave bodyboarder and at one point ate a tomato. Isaac conquered his fear of talking to people who he doesn’t understand easily, and swam in some deep water. Col rescued us from a frog in the house (in a jug with a towel on top – talk about fortitude) I could go on, but you get the picture.

We have had a blast – there’s many snapshots that come to mind as I write – the lady whose house had fallen on top of her in the night; Pete at the farm in Clarens, showing us his glass blowing in the dark, and then producing a baby elephant out of the flames, perfectly formed with tiny ears rippling back as if it were walking – we were enraptured, it’s a wonder we didn’t cause him to burn himself as we were a very interactive audience; the guy who said our accents sounded like Jamie Oliver; the crocodile man who’d had the shirt ripped off him; the couple who were refugees from The Conga, who’d just lost a sister in crossfire back home; the one armed man who sold us a hat at the Lesotho border; Obeking, the little boy who showed us around Dihlebeng School and, realising he was on to a good thing missing lessons, read out every single bit of work on the walls of every classroom, “OK, so this little girl, she says she’s learning about earthquakes, see?. .… and this little boy he says he is too…”; Gavin and the Clarens crowd around a mighty BBQ, cooking steaks the size of the cushions we put on garden chairs; the potato seller who laughed his head off when the tarpaulin roof gave way and soaked me to the skin with skanky water; the waiter who couldn’t hide his terror when we reported that there was a snake under the table; Gibson, the kids’ first little friend who put his arms around their shoulders and helped them settle in; the Zulu actor saying she didn’t think her suitor was up to scratch, “I no marry you, you is ug!”; Megan and Drew’s daughters tucked up all in a row across the bed, with Evie in the middle, not believing her luck; the kids way back at Bokletsa Bana who thought our white man’s noses were so hilarious because they’re so pointy. Heh heh! People, people everywhere - we’ve loved it.

They’re not like the people at home though – nothing can compete with that kind of quality! Which reminds me – HAPPY WEDDING DAY to the Knights!! X x x x x

hello from the hobo's

Did you know hobo is short for 'Homeward bound'? Which we most certainly are not. It seems that we are the last ones stranded - everyone else we have heard of has made it home. But we are trying to have fun, with almost 100% success! We moved into a flat on Sunday, kindly lent to us by a couple we’d never met. It's our 8^th bed of the trip (11^th if you count beds we have left and returned to! I worked this out on a long journey - sad I know.) To celebrate that it is our last bed, allegedly, I unpacked and hung everything up. Yey! We have slowly got the hang of Durban since, but we have got lost many many times too. I have made an effort to put the crime stories to the back of my mind, and anyway when you are among people who live here you just have to get on with it. So we have.

On Sunday we went to church and had lunch with Drew and Megan who were hosting Julian Adams – a bloke we have seen from afar and never met - who has a gift for bringing in the immediacy of God – well exciting. Our family had a series of mishaps throughout church, with Evie falling on to the corner of a metal screen just as it started. She had a yellow/green bump the size of a walnut on her head with a small nick on top. Eeeeeeew!! But by the time I picked her up from the kids club she was jumping up and down on the top of a climbing frame as if nothing had happened. Isaac was bleeding from both toes (football) and then Fin came to me bleeding from the back of a head (tree). It’s never dull. And it made sure everyone got to know us.

We met up with Peyman and Diane from Worthing yesterday at a water park. It was a cool place, really well designed eg. As you floated around the Easy River on a rubber ring, you’d float past the sharks in their tank from the aquarium. There was a water chute that used rubber boats that fitted our whole family inside so we whizzed down there with extra glee. So much fun. It was a bad day to be a muslim though – I felt sorry for the women completely covered up except their eyes, how boiling hot and bored they must have been. And even the guys going down the slides etc – in long trousers and tunics all clinging and wrinkled in the wet.

We have had some good chats with the kids in Durban because it is as if all the extremes we’ve seen round Africa are condensed in to one big melting pot, plus a few different populations thrown in too. At the traffic lights you get people begging at the car window – sometimes holding a baby or pointing to their disability. Our children say we should give them something, but if we did that every time we'd soon run out of money. We've talked about how poverty is very complicated. In Lesotho it seemed as if women were holding the whole show together. It's the women chopping wood, carrying stuff by the roadside, babies on their back, working all day then caring for the family. We met so many kids who were home alone for the day cos mum or aunty is working (even making bricks - so physically demanding). Where are the men? "Drinking" they'd say. (Or AWOL. Or dead. Or HIV+). It's a huge problem that we have just brushed alongside for a few weeks and observed, and I guess our children will have a very black and white view of it, like children do. There are many issues back home but they are more hidden than here, so we've concentrated our chats around what our response will be back in Worthing. Child 2's idea: "Get everyone to come to church then they will hear about love and nocturnal life*" Hmmmm, maybe...

*eternal life

it's not so bad

... and a semi circle

We've made the 4 or 5 drive back to Durban after all! In the end our car hire has ended up dictating our time here, as the latest figure we were quoted turned out to be missing a zero off the end - well almost. So we had to leave leafy Clarens and come back here to get the car back to the airport and pick up a smaller model. Hopefully that is the last big drive we'll do for a long, long time. (Although the times tables are sounding more solid!)

Great to hear my mate Becky is back on English turf and that Debbie is enjoying free entry at Sea World! It's such a funny time I can't wait to swap stories. It sounds fab but it's also a pressure. Our children are totally disorientated - they don't know what day of the week it is or where they are, and we've had some odd conversations about what's happening, "Well we don't exactly know, but we might go to X's house, you know the one with the 2 big dogs... no, not those dogs, the one who had the little girl... no not that little girl, she lives by the sea, no the one who lives in Lesotho, whose dad had a hairy jumper"

For us it's been a bit of a roller coaster - hopes dashed then a great result, then a sudden change, then a BINGO moment. We had two great things in one afternoon today though - the hire company waived a fee (at last, some mercy!!) and we arrived at Drew and Megan's again without knowing quite where we were staying and it turns out we're staying here the weekend - Sing Hosannas! Kids are running around (7 of them altogether) with spears, Col's playing table tennis and later on we're crashing in on their friends' evening - chilli and DVD's. On Sunday we're moving in to somebody's flat. It's weird to feel so vulnerable but every small kindness feels magnified when you are. I've lost count of the times this trip when I've said to someone 'we'd love to return the favour one day'.

So the immediate future's bright. The sun is out. We're all well. There's a craft market on Saturdays!!

Busy doing nothing, working the whole day through

It's been lovely to hear from folks these last few days as we feel far from home. Harold and Betty phoned me from their summer house in Lancing - hurray! We are so disappointed to miss Luke and Ellie's wedding and we want full reports on it, especially the best man's speech.

We are doing OK over here, we've had a change in pace to say the least, not like all the squeezing in of holiday activity during last week. We were a bit weary yesterday after more travelling and the endless sorting out of stuff. The day passed easily - I did a ton of washing and the children were scrubbed - a bit like sheep lining up at the sheep dip. They emerged looking shiny and much less tanned. Evie was the most dramatically transformed, from Stig of the Dump to Pocohontas' exotic little sister. We went out to try and sort out the car (still ongoing) and by the time we came back all the washing outside was damp again - agh!! It seems night falls very quickly here and also Autumn is in full swing. Maybe I shouldn't have given quite as many clothes away when we were in Maseru. . .

Clarens feels very much like home to us and as I've been wandering it's easy to chat as we have a story as to why we're here. There are shops that remind me a bit of the shop in The Waltons, and there are many many dogs that we now count as close friends. The best way to describe it is to liken it to Arundel, in terms of scale and quiantness. It is set amongst the mountains in the Dihlabeng region of the Free State. It is a hub of artistic interest, with more art galleries than you could shake a stick at. It's the kind of place where you could buy something incredibly beautiful to hang on your wall, or something ingenious from a self-assembled craft stall, but you'd struggle to buy a pair of trainers or a cheese grater. It also has the amazing church which I described when we first arrived here - a community which has people coming and going from all over the world. Why here, in the middle of nowhere? Because of people with vision and faith - it's fascinating really. One gets so frustrated with the town planners of Worthing, but I won't start harping on about that now. (One day though!) This church has actualised much that we are hoping to do in our church and local community back home, so we have a strong link with the people here.

Today the kiddiwinks and I went for a walk and shared a chelsea bun, then posted Nanny's 70th birthday card (sorry to miss that too!) which of course was sent by airmail (!?). On the way back I concluded that adults and children are not designed to be together 24/7 like this for longer than 3 weeks. We spent ages looking for a dropped Lego trophy which is helpfully shaped and coloured like a rolled-up autumn leaf. Then Evie said to me, "Mum... our heads are like marbles aren't they? Just really massive big marbles....". Meanwhile I discovered that one boy had drawn on the other's chest before coming out, and that they had invented alter egos which involved extra shouting in the name of being rappers. Ho hum..

I sought out some adult company later on, and, more importantly, borrowed some DVD's!! Result. The kids are doing a bit of work too, mostly intensive times tables and art. The daughter of our absent hosts has an art book which we are using - how handy is that - and we're surrounded by inspiration, not least her art which is stunning. I'll ask permission to put some on here when I get home (when the dust settles - arf arf)

Full circle

OK so we've come full circle, and we're back in Clarens in the pouring rain. We would have been on the plane now but for the ash cloud. It's been a few days of challenges - emotional, practical and financial. But the decision is that we wait for the next flight Virgin can offer us (2nd May now!) so we're booked on that. Virgin don't seem to be too forthcoming on alternative arrangements unless we have thousands of pounds to spend. No wonder Richard Branson always looks so happy. We had to pay £225 just to postpone our internal flight and we also had to extend the car hire. But the good news is that we've got free accommodation, we're self catering and, let's not forget, I'm with my favourite 4 people on earth. We hear stories of folks being put up in 5 star hotels but we also hear stories of folks being really stuck. I can only imagine the media coverage back home - is it all people on airport camp beds, cradling babies and looking ravaged? We're out of it really, although if Jeremy Vine phoned me I'd definitely ham it up a bit, it'd be rude not to. (I could threaten to pull Richard Branson's beard in a fit of rage)

So anyway we came back to Clarens because our New Best Friends Gavin and Lynne are away and they offered us the house. Great. And we plan to return to Durban next week when we've sorted ourselves out a bit. I feel safe here and Col's hoping to work - I didn't fancy navigating Durban alone as we ended up in some pretty rough bits yesterday. (Even at the entrance to the aquarium they searched our bags. And there was a sign up. "No firearms. No picnic hampers. Enjoy your stay". What damage could be done with a picnic hamper?)

I'm not sure what we'll actually DO here in Clarens though - a very very big jigsaw perhaps? I'll probably feel more creative in the morning. It's nice to be doing half our time here, half there - that way we're not abusing anyone's kindness too much, I mean who really wants a family of 5 camping out with them for a full fortnight? We are blown away by peoples' kindness, we feel part of a very big and wonderful family and I don't really know what we'd have done if it were any different.

Today a great mission was accomplished. We found the best milkshakes in the world, recommended to us by Pete the glass blower. He said if we ever went in to Durban we must go to a certain Mall and just ask around and they'd know where we meant. So that's what we did - it was a very serious task and I can report that YES, they really were The Best. Belgian Chocolate flavour. Even more delicious: Broadwater School phoned my mobile during the quest to ask about the whereabouts of our sons! Can you imagine the glee of said sons? Double jubilation. Sorry Mr Tostevin, we did try and run through some times tables tonight on another endless car journey, honest.

In the mall I went in to an Indian shop full of beautiful saris and was suddenly aware of the state we looked. The kids are a mass of grazes and scrapes, their feet are black from running around outside, and I look like I've been camping out. 4 week old nail varnish on toes, hair "inexplicable" as Chandler said to Monica, and suddenly we were in designer-ville. It is as if we're ping pong balls being bounced around between totally different worlds. One day you're in a mud hut, painfully aware of looking so rich, carrying your digital camera and bottled water, next day you're getting pitying glances from exquisitely dressed sales assistants. It's certainly a land of extremes. Like today - we woke up by the ocean - coconut trees and lizards, and we're going to bed in the mountains - nearly ran over an owl if you can believe that?!

I hear Leighton bought more food for the gerbils. What else is he up to? Playing the piano to his heart's content I hope, maybe the builders are singing along. Enjoy yourself Leighton. Have wild parties, live a little! All I ask is that you save me a tea bag, I miss PG tips.

Message in a bottle

StuCk in AfRica.Stop.PleaSe feeD GerbiLs.StOp.

You know when it's time to go home. a) We're all in our penultimate pair of pants. b) Col sneezed and popped open the fastener at the top of his trousers.

It's meant to be the last day of our trip but last night we heard our flight tomorrow is cancelled. Husband then made a series of phone calls which I only heard one side of': "..... 1st of MAY?? You're kidding...... Paris? No, I can't do that with the family..... A train..from Spain..? (nervous laughter)...." I love a bit of drama.

Then there was the insurance. All parties said it wasn't up to them, or they just had an answer machine on. Or they'd just gone home! I sometimes wonder if we'll ever have a straight forward insurance conversation where they say "Oh don't worry, we'll cover that! That's why you pay us insurance! *wink*". Even having the car written off by two drunken Polish people with a bottle of whiskey in their laps - even this is not straight forward.

However, we're having loads of fun. We went body boarding yesterday and today we saw sharks in the aquarium at Durban before hooking up with old friends Megan and Drew Land which has been lovely. We are just going to have to wait and see about getting home. 1st May seems a bit excessive and the words "home schooling" have been mentioned (Pam falls to knees and wails skyward, "Nooooooooooo!!!!)

We're meant to fly from Durban to Jo'burg tomorrow anyhow and then we'll wait and see. We've had offers of places to stay and we might see if we can extend the hire of our car in order to do that, as everyone is quite dispersed here. Hakuna Matata and all that!! We're honestly fine so nobody must worry x

The perfect crime

We’ve been making like David Bellamy these last few days, on safari in a game park called Hluhluwe. It’s best pronounced if you puff your cheeks out as if you were doing Donald Duck. On our first morning we woke up to find monkeys on the balcony, and we watched delightedly as they ate lots of bananas and jumped around on our chairs outside. I thought to myself, ‘This was so worth the money. Loads more fun than buying a few more panes of double glazing.’ My sentiments changed 10 minutes later when the boys discovered it was OUR FOOD they were eating!! They’d been in to the kitchen somehow and made a right old mess, nibbling bits of apples and ripping in to the bread, leaving remnants of food all over the work top and floor. We have no idea how they did it, because all the doors and windows were shut, and despite the efforts of all the kids’ investigations, including photographing the evidence, we have had to conclude that the monkeys are special agents with secret powers. “The perfect crime”, Colin said. We were robbed by sweet little monkeys. And we didn’t even see it coming.

We actually had a stressful start to the whole safari thing the night before as we arrived in the dark, quarter of an hour before the gates close (whether you’re booked in or not!) after travelling since 7.30 that morning. Then we had to drive through the park, which is about the size of an English county, whilst Col explained to kids that it wasn’t like a zoo and we probably wouldn’t see things very close up – then Eeeeek! He shrieked like a girl as we nearly knocked in to 2 enormous rhino chomping away next to the road. Shortly afterwards we did the same with a couple of elephants. This time we wound the windows down and watched in silence. Everything was going well until child C slipped inside the car, clattered loudly and frightened them. Col then laughed in the elephants’ faces (nervous laughter) as the biggest elephant snorted and started towards us. I think he felt Col was mocking him. At this point Col (Terry Nutkins) slammed his foot down and did a slight wheel spin – helpful – as we made off in the dark, wheels squealing. Maybe we are more suited to Butlins than this kind of holiday. Anyway, we settled in the next day and saw loads of amazing animals with the help of a trained man in a jeep – it was awesome.

We are nearer Durban now, gradually getting nearer to the airport, staying by the beach in a place called Ballito. It is a bit more sub-tropical here so it’s full of all my favourite plants. Banana trees, palms, hibiscus – I love all that.

I’ve been thinking whilst I’ve been so far from the internet – blogging is a bit weird as you only write about all the cool stuff. It’s a bit like our memories of things I suppose, when we filter out all the tat. And the reality of travelling is that there’s loads of annoying bits. Here is a taste of them, so I can’t be accused of being unreal.

Boredom; Losing car keys in middle of nowhere and having to turn out all luggage twice; Driving for hours and hours on end; Arriving at Bollito flat in the dark and not being able to get in, no staff, and yet not being able to get out because of electric gates. (Laptop out of battery. Phone not accepting incoming calls); Singing ‘Is this the way to Amarillo’ one time too many in the car; Waiting for things in the heat; Listening to bickering in the back of the car. Eg. Every time 3 treats are given out they have the same argument:

“First is the worst, second’s the best, third’s the one with hairy chest”

“I don’t WANNA HAIRY CHEST!!!!”

“OK, OK, I’ll have a hairy chest, you be first”

“I wanna be second” etc etc;

Living with ants in the kitchen; Late nights, early mornings, disrupted sleep in between; Driving for hours looking for lions and not finding any lions; Shops being shut when the staff promised they’d be open; Sunburn; Not finding recognisable food in a supermarket (I bought the kids a chicken’s foot each – heh heh!); Bites; Moths, insects; Child-free couples not appreciating the joys of other peoples’ children enhancing their safari trip of a lifetime!!

It goes without saying that all the great stuff is way better and much more plentiful than any of this. But there, I’ve let you in on the truth.

Into the wilds...

We're in Maseru again after another long journey with the aid of everything ranging from SClub7's, "Reach" to The Killers to Shirley Bassey's "Kiss me honey honey" (a real low point). Since I last wrote we've spent a few days in the middle of nowhere - up and down dirt tracks going round the mountains, which was great fun for those in the back of the pick up truck. My boys were allowed on there for one return journey in the dark, so all we could see was their white faces when our headlights caught them at the right angle - they were hyped!! While we were out in the villages we joined with the locals in activities like football, parachute games and visiting, then in the evening (which was exceptionally beautiful as the sun went down) we were very privileged to witness the popping up of a brand new church. They all crammed in to a tiny room and there was much expectation for the future together - the only downer was that they could only jump up and down on the spot as there wasn't much space! I should mention that at every place we go people are keen to pray for the town and church in Worthing. (Yes, really! They pray for the nations here as a matter of course.) Oh, and there was a bloke playing a makeshift banjo which was made with some kind of biscuit tin with a strip of wood for a fret board, and 3 rubbery strings!

The village where we were based was also very rural, and the community put us all up (the whole team) amongst themselves. I heard of one lady who shared her bed with a girl while her sister, who usually shares the bed, slept on the floor. We were lucky enough to be with a western family who served us so well. We were all in one room with a porta-potty and our only challenge was the pitch black (which turned out to be enough of a challenge for us this time around!) The family do have electricity from a solar panel, but they use it sparingly so we could hardly bleat, "we usually have the landing light on at home!". In the morning we went to fetch water with them and visited various pigs and chickens around their neighbourhood. They have a toddler and a small 3 year old and were just like us so I think our experience with them has been easier for our own children to relate to. Again, we tried carrying the water on our heads (!) and then poured it in to their big tank where it gets filtered. Phew - hard work. On the way we saw shepherds, a lizard, and a pile of cakes made from cow manure, used for starting fires once it's dried in the sun. Our hostess explained lots of things to us during the morning.

Here are some of those things:

There is no word for 'please' in Sosotho.

In their culture you don't offer things like breakfast or a drink or whatever, you wait to be asked. (The exact opposite of what I spend my energy telling our kids - they loved this!)

They take great care of their homes, usually emptying them out for cleaning daily (which explains the luggage piled up in the shacks we'd visited - they must keep all their stuff in there for easy removal).

The people hosting our team would probably have been cleaning all day, including polishing the insides of their pans for goodness sake.

They take great care of their clothes (which explains the iron and ironing board in our hostel at Maseru).

Finally, in the Bosotho culture, like many African cultures, people think corporately, not individually. There's hardly any 'mine' and 'yours'. This sounds idyllic but it means that somebody who tries to get ahead may be brought down by those around him - eg. A guy they know planted a whole patch of veggies, which his neighbour then burnt down. Every culture has its' challenges I guess.

It was a very special 24 hours for the Nichols but it was also really nice to leave the dust and mud, and get back to Clarens to get showered and eat chips - yey! When we arrived back at the farm the kids were SO excited to see the dogs there, Georgie and Bentley, I realised how sad they'll be to leave next week. Eeek!

Feeling Hot, Hot, Hot! (by Kool and the gang I think)

Well here we are in Lesotho. It's one of the poorest countries in the world they say; 70% unemployment, land-locked, mountainous and infertile, the gift from the whites to the Bosotho tribe as a kind of a pay off in an argument over land ownership. (Nice.) We drove from South Africa yesterday evening and left the empty but pretty scenery behind. The border was like arriving at a different world. Out of nothing popped a bustling city - Maseru, with folks carrying piles of stuff over the bridge on wheelbarrows or trolleys, and huge long queues in which we were the only white faces. It was really great fun. Once over the border we met up with the Worthing team and had a wonderful buffet in a posh hotel, which didn't seem right but we got over it (!) and even had extra puddings and wine. (At £9 a head it seemed rude not to). A certain Joe Whitchurch took it upon himself to coach our boys in the art of getting the maximum amount of food possible in a buffet situation. It was quite a marathon.

Today has been my favourite day by far, as I finally got to go out in to the community and see for myself what its like in the trickiest areas. We decided to go as a family and I think they coped OK. We had really friendly people with us from the church here so they explained things as we went. We visited a family who have twin babies who are not growing well ("shrinking", Isaac explained later), with a 3 year old lying in a cast up to the hip, and a 5 year old girl holding the whole thing together as mum has to work, both parents HIV positive, all living in a hot tin shack the size of a garden shed. It was a desperate scene. We also saw a family of EIGHT kids in a similar state and later on, I went with a few ladies to see a 7 year old boy whose friends had come to find the church to ask someone to go and pray as he was very sick. (In this area it is lovely as people know the church will help.) When we were there I had the weird experience of being asked what to do. Take a moment here to ponder with me. Calpol? no. Nurofen? no. NHS Direct? nope. Local doctor? no. A&E ? no chance. Advice online? no. It sounds really obvious but when you're face to face with it you realise just how cushioned we are in the UK. Same with the twins. We would scoop them up and get them somewhere, make a scene, get something done, but here there's just not that kind of expectation. Talk about a postcode lottery.

This afternoon we helped at a kids club in the field called Bokletsa Bana - where children from the township just turn up and get the chance to be children for a couple of hours. It was brilliant. Evie nearly got crushed in a frenzy of sticker-distribution. In the end she was shouting 'Calm DOWN!', it was so funny. Parachute games, snacks, Kath with a huge bottle of bubbles (the kids went crazy!), water bombs, team games and then at the end they danced and sang and cavorted, played football and did little shows for each other until we thought they would drop. Truly a lovely scene. As we drove off they were all waving and running alongside our car - such sweet little friendly kids but you can't help wondering what will happen to them. Col said he and Jez racked their brains last year on the trip, trying to think of ideas for local businesses here to kick start some sort of change, but it's a tough one - any suggestions welcome.

So we're in a kind of youth hostel here, in a family room. I can explain its contents on 30 seconds: 4 beds, 3 self adhesive hooks (white plastic ones like you would buy in a 2-pack at B&Q), and.... an iron and ironing board!? I hardly iron at home, let alone here. Does anyone else find that a bit weird? I guess they take great care of their clothes here. Same with the houses - even the shacks are emptied every morning, swept out and then re-filled, I've been told.

I don't know how to finish today. Three cheers for the NHS maybe. I'll let you decide, dear reader. x

The world of the strange

Newsflash: We just saw Pete Fitzgerald from Jubilee Worthing on TV. We were in a township in a very 'bling' house with big leather sofas and a telly, hearing about how the occupants used to worship ancestors and visit the witch doctor before they became christians - and up popped Pete rocking out in his baseball cap at the Big Church Day Out last summer! All the Nichols shouted out/ jumped up, "WE KNOW HIM!!!!" Poor guy telling the story, we must have seemed very rude. He also told us how he'd been tortured by the police and imprisoned without trial in the apartheid years. (But we saw our friend on telly!!) He finished by saying how he'd managed to forgive them "because of the cross". I said to child B, "Well if he can get over that, you can get over having your football nicked". (As soon as I said it I thought I sounded like someone from the Brady Bunch, getting a lesson out of everything.) It all sounds very intense and sobering, but honestly, if you'd have been there you'd have felt fine because he was obviously fine, in fact much more than fine - happier than your average Brit complaining of bad service in a queue.

The conference was fun and Col did brilliantly (of course!) so there was no need for our back-up song. Hands up who has had that song in their minds since? "Side by side on my keyboard, oh Lord, why can't weeee?" Husband communicated well and won lots of hearts. He also brought home as a trophy a glitter globe from Dubai with a camel in it. The Dubai team seemed to be giving out gifts at every opportunity - so sweet. They also contributed some Hindi dancing which we all tried to learn. Some stage diving happened but that was mostly local teenagers I think. Let's just say there was much liberation and fun, and it did us all the world of good. Our own children loosened up as the days went on, with the help of their new friends. I have to say they did very well, coping with long days, sitting on a blanket in the corner doing some very intense and relentless sharing with other children, some of which I believe had just walked in off the street. I was soon suffering conference fatigue so I think they actually lasted longer than me.

A major challenge to us has been the amount of coming and going that we've witnessed. People moving out to the sticks and leaving behind their home comforts. People leaving the beautiful open countryside of Clarens and moving in to a tower block on another continent. People giving of themselves and making enormous sacrifices that I am struggling to convey in these moments of internet connection because I am simultaneously saying hello to 50 or so people who are arriving for a BBQ. More on this later perhaps...

My little snapshot is this: Col getting grabbed by Miriam, a huge African mama in her apron, who spun him round and round before getting called back to the kitchen where she then cooked our meal with her gang (they cooked for 300 guests). As we left hours later, they were washing up, some with babies strapped on their backs with a towel, still giggling and singing while we squelched down the muddy hill in our flip flops. Very humbling.

Live from The Artist's Cafe 'where the food is art'. Yum.

At last some internet connection. We're having a milkshake and the kids are playing on a rusty tractor. (It's gloriously health-and-safety-free here, you can dangle from a balcony if you want, or stand in the back of a pick up truck, it's all up to you). We've had a great few days. Personally I feel like my insides and brain have been taken out and are being jiggled around before being put back in. Not in a 'Delhi Belly' kinda way, more that we're way out of our comfort zone and everything is so different it makes you think and sometimes that's tough. In a good way though.

The Worthing team should be on their way over now, and I can't wait. I have compiled a rota so that we can take turns to absorb Evie's non-stop narrative on events. "Aww, look, a puppy dog.... ooo, gorgeous chair.... mum,mum, look - a baby.." it goes on and on. She does seem to be sleeping a lot though which is apparently due to the high altitude. We've taken to blaming anything irregular on this. I was even told that water boils at a lower temperature so therefore your cup of tea cools quicker (?), and I remember once being told that it causes you to have funny dreams. Talking of tea, thanks for all the comments. Tim I thought of you talking about me being a lady when I got out my granny's opera glasses from their red leather clasped purse - ha ha!! To look at a gnu. I doubt there was ever a gnu seen through them before, especially in Hertfordshire, and it made me giggle. "We're all ladies here you know!" We were at a sanctuary for wild cats where we saw all kinds of wonders, safely caged. You'll never guess Evie's favourite bit though - an egg in a birds' nest. (Pigeon's I think Julie x)

As I write Colin is desperately putting together a preach for tomorrow morning. People are flying in from all over for a conference that starts tonight, so the pressure's on. It is all translated so it'll take twice the time, therefore he only needs to prepare half the amount, surely? It was a bit weird this morning to meet a gang from Dubai, including Harold and Pixie from Pakistan, who recognised us as they came to dinner at our house in 2002!! Normally I would remember what I was wearing etc but I was pregnant at the time so.... nothing.

This morning we climbed a mountain behind our house and surveyed the view - stunning. I have a feeling the boys will always remember it because they scrambled far away up on the rocks and were really proud of themselves. Some street dancing may have occurred at the top but they probably wouldn't want me to tell you about it.

OK well that's probably enough for now. The next few days should be fascinating. Rich and poor, black and white sharing a few days together. We have seen porsches, and even a Rolls Royce in this tiny town (Isaac's wishes came true!). We've also seen tin shacks with piles of wood keeping the roof on. It's very extreme, but in the church, Dihlabeng, everyone is there under one name and with one purpose. I apologise in advance for getting a bit 'churchy' the next few days if that's not your thing, but hopefully you'll get the gist (or you can zone out for a while). Hey, if Col's preach bombs we can sing "Ebony and Ivory" instead, we've already practised the harmonies in the car. If you know Col you know it's vital he carries the tune otherwise it all goes horribly wrong, which is endlessly amusing on long journeys. (Who puts this stuff on my iPod anyway??)

Songs of Praise (without the aid of Aled Jones)

Picture the scene - we went to church yesterday for the first time and as we came over the hill we could see people threading their way from all directions to be together. Folks with umberellas for shade walking down from the townships, folks all piled in to the back of pick-up trucks, gangs of little kids running along the roadside, it was lovely. Our children were all mouth and no trousers about how they were going to make friends and how they were so cool but I could see they were a bit nervous. They needn't have been. We were barely in the building before they were in the midst of a gaggle of little black boys - one with a Ben 10 T shirt! These kids brought tears to my eyes, they were so sweet and friendly. Gibson had his arms around my boys, and stayed in the middle of our family for the whole morning. He translated bits of Sesotho songs for them, held their drinks and told them to shut their eyes when praying (!) and even held Evie's sore leg for a while. After their lessons outside under the gazebo in the baking heat, they played football together - the moment Isaac's been waiting for since we bought him a shiny new ball to bring and share here.

As for us, well we really enjoyed church and I especially loved the main bloke singing and dancing about like a loon, doing high kicks and mucking around whilst singing his worship songs - it was such FUN it just made me laugh and laugh. Col shouted in my ear that this guy, Sam, was in prison before he became a christian, he'd been deeply involved in the ANC. He and many others there paint a picture of what the gospel is all about - full restoration, changed lives and great big grins - an overflow of the joy that can only come from God. Happy clappy? You betcha!

Africa baby YEAH!

OK but don't get too jealous - it's been raining. We woke up in the night to a humungous thunder storm and it hasn't stopped pouring since! It is flooded around our house. It has started drying up now, and I bet it will dry quickly so it's not like camping-at-Newday rain. I'm glad the children didn't wake up though because they would have freaked out - it was pretty scary!

Look at us Brits, talking about the weather. First things first eh? I haven't got internet access so I am having to PAY to bore you about the weather. I feel a bit under pressure actually - I've probably wasted 50p already, telling you all this...

It was great to leave Worthing. Child B was really tearful about the wrecked car. so we had to comfort him whilst clearing out said car and taking off its' roof rack etc as it'll be towed away while we're here. Just the kind of stuff you don't expect to be doing at the last minute! Then we picked our way around the wreckage, past all the builders and drove off, not in to the sunset so much, but out of the sea mist. I'd love to say we were elated but we were mostly stressed and exhausted to be honest. It's not like the movies, despite Alice Cooper's best efforts on the iPod.

I can't leave out the fact that I was next to an unfortunately large lady on the night flight, who at one point had me wedged in my seat. Fun times.

So anyway, Africa. We flew to Johannesburg then drove 4 or 5 hours up to Clarens. Before leaving the city the kids spotted a McDonalds and begged us to stop. You can guess that our reply was in the negative. The first thing I like to do in a new country is to have a nap. It's a bit like the pope kissing the ground, it's just my way of saying 'hello, I come in peace and I plan to make my home with you for a while'. So I did that for a bit (because I was nearly doing it whilst driving) then Col drove for ages. It was a bit of a blur - a long straight road with hours in between towns. I have never seen anywhere so empty. We saw people working in the fields or hitching lifts along the roadside and we couldn't see where they'd come from or where they might be going. We also spotted a buck and, our favourite thing so far, some kids carrying things on their heads. Our kids have been trying to 'be African' this morning - carrying things on their heads - but I have to say they're not very good at it.

When we got to Clarens we immediately went to the church building (we're with Colin after all!) and met some friends, stretched our legs and took a moment to see where we were - a beautiful, quiet place which, to me, seems to have a story on every corner. I can't wait to explore. A wonderful lady, Jemina, made me a cup of tea and I could have kissed her. Isaac had a go on the drums, Evie found some ants and the boys ran around with football in the main hall, which opens up to a breathtaking view of Lesotho. Phew. We'd arrived. And that felt like enough for one day.

Pack-athon 2010

If only we had sponsors we could have done it for Sports Relief.  It's been a marathon pack, and I'm not exactly famed for my packing skills. On our trip it could be hot, it could be cold, it could rain - basically we need everything. Part of my charm is that I tend to leave it until the last minute and, worse, I want to leave everything tidy (why? It's not tidy when we're here, so why leave it tidy when we're not even around to enjoy it?). 

The problem with being a last-minute-person is that there's no time left for things to go wrong. Like having to see my hero-dentist-friend Pete today about a chipped tooth, and then tonight having to see various policemen because, would you believe it, someone has careered in to our empty car tonight and written it off in a drunken hit and run. One minute Col's round the corner buying a balti at Eshna's, then next minute we're picking bits of Alpha Romeo up from all along our street. Talk about ruining somebody's curry night. On the positive side several neighbours came out (it was a very loud crash) so I can confirm that community spirit is alive and kicking. Also positive, I hadn't wasted any time clearing the car out as well as the house. 

OK, well on with the show. I only have to finish eating the contents of the fridge and then we can leave. Here's what we're looking forward to:

Evie: 

1) dancing   

2) riding a giraffe (aren't their backs too sloped?)  

3)  seeing a monkey and if he's fluffy and if it likes her, giving it a sticker

Isaac: 

1) seeing cool cars at the airport (I blame Jeremy Clarkson for this)  

2) having his own telly on the aeroplane 

Fin:

1) having his own telly on the aeroplane 

I don't think I will really believe it's happening until I am sitting on the plane with a large (plastic) glass of something. In fact I will toast you all. We've had many lovely messages and we feel very grateful for the friends we have so thank you.  x

A gig in a wig

OK, deep breath and I've jumped in. 

I have only played a few gigs so far with my world-famous-in-some-corners-of-Worthing band Sidekicks, but on Saturday we did our first party. We played at a 70's themed house warming and met some lovely people. There was an overgrown Superman swooping his cape like a matador, and a Kings of Leon fan who was looking pretty sweaty by the end because he had chosen the Scooby Doo costume at the shop. I would say the house was warmed up nicely, with the aid of gorgeous hosts,  many platform shoes, wigs, very snug catsuits and even the odd pair of hot pants (on a pair of hairy male legs. Every time I shut my eyes I can still see it).  

The next morning a different brand of silliness ensued - this time it was the church variety. Let's just say that after physio first thing Monday morning Col wondered if he might have overdone it, what with the Suggs-style SKA conga and the African dancing he suddenly decided to teach everyone. Hopping and twisting on a knee joint that's been recently reconstructed? "I should have lead with my left leg..." he reflected. We are truly a family of attention seekers. Hence my decision to write a blog! We can keep in touch whilst we're on our trip to Africa (well that's my excuse anyway) x